Why putting your dress out is not enough.

So #putyourdressout is trending on the net today where women are hanging their wedding or special dress on the front door. It's supposedly been initiated by Stephanie Scott's family as a way to remember her life on what should have been her wedding day and raise awareness of violence against women. 

Here's the thing.

Hanging your wedding dress on your front door out of respect for Stephanie is wonderful. If that brings you some comfort & makes you feel closer to a woman, who's life was cut way too short then go nuts. If you think that it will help less women get killed, you're fucking delusional.

I find this is somewhat along the lines of #makeupfreeselfieforcancer. Slacktivism. Where people can feel good about themselves by thinking they are actually standing up for something they believe in, without actually having to do very much at all.

By putting a dress out the front of your door, you are not helping to end the fight of violence against women. Not even close. It's not enough.

30 women have already been killed this year. 2 a week. The news stories run sad film for a week or so, Twitter blows up about violence against women, then another woman is killed so the first is forgotten and then the cycle is repeated. Do you know why?

Because violence against women is so ingrained in our culture that we don't even bother to fight anymore. Or we fight for a little bit, but then we just continue to live our lives because it's all just too hard.

We elected a man, who's head of a party that ran a 'ditch the witch' campaign against our first EVER female PM. LNP candidate Mal Brough held a fundraiser that had a menu that talked about her small tits & red box. We talked about what she was wearing & who coloured her hair. The now MALE Prime Minister has appointed himself Minister for WOMEN and cut funding to domestic violence services for fuck's sake! There's one women who managed to get his approval and we talk about how she must be a 'ball busting bitch'. That just touches on the people who run our country. Run. Our. Country.

When Jill Meagher was killed there was a huge outcry of 'why was she by herself at that time of the morning!?' A priest just a few weeks ago said she'd still be alive if she'd had 'more faith' because she'd be in bed not walking down that street. Then just last month, a teenage girl got stabbed to death walking through the park, in broad daylight. And what do we say? Oh she shouldn't have had her earphones in.  A prostitute gets murdered and we say 'she was an easy target'.

COME THE FUCK ON AUSTRALIA!

So what are we going to say about Stephanie who was AT WORK when she was killed? Working is too dangerous so women should stay at home and let the big tough men go out into the big bad world for them? Oh wait, 96% of women get killed by an intimate partner! So I guess that rules out staying home too.

If we want to stop violence against women, we have to get rid of the mentality that women aren't worth as much as men! Boys are being brought up with the covert message that women are weak, easy targets and their lives aren't worth as much as a mans', partly because of the messages above! A woman shouldn't have to be on guard, walking through a park in the middle of the day. A woman should be able to walk a few blocks home at any time of the night, not having to fear for her life. A prostitute has just as much right to life as a 26 year old school teacher. 

This goes hand in hand with my previous post about rape. If a woman is raped she was 'asking for it', or 'drunk what did she expect?' or 'dressed provocatively'. Fuck that shit. Men just shouldn't fucking rape! I should be able to walk down the street naked, drunk and swinging my tits around my ears without the fear that I will get raped and murdered.

'But that's not how it is!!' I hear you cry. And my question is why the fuck not? 'You don't leave your house unlocked and expect not to get robbed'. Why the fuck not? Why are we such a fucking victim blaming fucking society that the criminals get more sympathy than the victims? I don't give a fat rat's arse if you've had a shit childhood. DON'T KILL PEOPLE! There are millions of other people who had pretty terrible upbringings, and guess what? They don't kill people. They manage to keep their dick in their pants when a woman says no to sex. I don't care if you never had a Daddy to show you the way. In that case you should have more bloody respect for women coz you got raised by one solely!

I wish we would get to the stage where a woman was raped and the first thought is 'what a piece of shit man, I hope he gets life imprisonment where he gets raped every day'. A woman gets murdered and that man goes to jail for life. Not 15 years - LIFE. Meaning you die in prison. If you go to jail for rape, then rape someone when you get out, you can't be rehabilitated and your dog arse gets no more parole opportunities. Full fucking stop.

So no, I won't be putting my dress out. Because if you put your dress out, then continue to tolerate sexist behaviour, nothing will change. Here's what I will be doing though.

I will be teaching my son, that violence against women is disgusting. I will teach him that you don't need friends that joke about rape. I will teach him what consent REALLY is. I will always take exception when a man makes an inappropriate joke around me. I will tell Tony Abbott that he can take my vote & shove it fair up his misogynist arse. I will write to my MP. I will stick up for my fellow women. I will loudly and repeatedly tell people that violence against women is not ok. And I will fight with everything I've got if a man ever decides that I'm an easy target. He better hit me so hard that I don't get up. Because if I get up - he's a fucking dead man. 

GIRL POWER YOU RAPING MURDERING PIECES OF DOG SHIT.

Cheers,

Qld Nurse.